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I can't address the headlight but the mirrors are easy. Just press and hold the mirror button on the armrest that is lit until it goes out. That disables the auto tilt feature.
The most common failure of the Automatic Focusing System is the height sensor on the rear suspension.
It tells the actuators that the rear is weighted down and to adjust the beam to avoid blinding oncoming traffic.
iolmaster is correct, leave the mirror control selector on "L" or "R" and both sides will tilt down in reverse.
Tap so neither light is lit and it cancels the feature. BTW on Lexus models starting in 2014 you can customize
the position of the mirrors while backing. On 2010's it is an arbitrary couple of degrees down.