MORAL OF THE STORY: Even ugly ducklings have a face a mother will love.


Although the current-generation Toyota Prius may rival it in the Looks-Can-Kill department, and the outrageously-styled (but unsuccessful and overpriced) Plymouth Prowler tried to be a niche-vehicle to aging Baby-Boomer street-rod fans, few modern vehicles have had an impact, from pure styling alone, on the automotive marketplace, as the infamous Pontiac Aztek. This vehicle is famous for turning off the public in droves, and quickly became the laughing-stock of not only most automotive journalists, but some non-automotive ones as well.

However, I will admit that styling is subjective, and one person's sow's ear is (or can be) another one's silk purse. This was brought home to me quite plainly one afternoon back in 2003 or 2004 (don't remember the exact date). One of my Supervisors (he was partially Hearing and Speech-Impared) had grabbed a well-earned retirement the previous year, and had sent me an E-mail asking me if I would help him find a replacement Chevy Suburban or GMC Yukon XL to replace his old Suburban (he travelled and carried heavy loads, hence the Suburban). He said his son-in-law would come along to help with the interpretation for me.

So, anyhow, all three of us did some searching, and a nearby Pontiac/GMC dealer (I think it was King Pontiac/GMC City) in Gaithersburg, MD had a light cement-gray-colored Yukon XL in stock, with matching-color interior (IMO, many GM interiors were awful in those days). It was in the price and equipment-range he was looking for. So, I agreed to go out to the place, look it over for him, test-drive it, inspect it for defects, and have the son-in-law (who drove a BMW 540i) do the same. I didn't like the brakes (neither did his son-in-law) as the brakes on full-sized GM truck-platforms were notoriously weak and ineffective back then, taking a LOT of pedal-pressure for even a moderate stop, but my ex-boss decided he wanted it, and took it home.

Well, I won't dwell on this story any more (it's not the actual subject of this write-up) because something very interesting happened while we were there looking at the Yukon XL. A fairly young couple (I'd estimate late 20s or early 30s) drove up, got out, went over to a white Aztec parked not far from where we were, and seemed to instantly fall in love with it. They seemed mesmerized with it, and looked it over inside and out like a kid with a new toy. Even the sales-rep was surprised, and confided to us (out of earshot of the couple, of course) that he had never seen anyone take to an Aztek like that. The other sales-rep, who was with the couple, went inside, got the keys and dealer-plate, and went out on a test-drive with them. That was it....sold. They got back, the Aztek went into the PDI wash-bay, was prepared, and the couple took it home that afternoon. The sales-rep who sold it to them told us the same thing that our own Yukon sales-rep did....that was one of the most remarkable sales they had ever seen at the dealership, and, of course, neither of them were complaining LOL. As the couple was getting ready to leave with their new Aztek, even though I didn't personally know them, I gave them a small bottle of SCRATCH-OUT...as I did my ex-boss as he left with his new Yukon XL.

Unlike most of my write-ups, I'm not going to get into the actual road-manners of the Aztek, or describe what it is like on the road, because I can't. I never actually got around to test-driving one, although, at the request of one of my other co-workers, I did test-drive the Buick Rendevous, which was done on the same platform as the Aztek and shared the same drivetrain (3.4L V6, 4-speed automatic) but had less-controversial styling and, IMO, a better interior. The Rendezvous drove exactly the way one would expect it to....basically a mid-sized crossover-appliance, although I suspect that the Aztek probably rode a little more firmly and handled a little better than the Buick, simply because most Pontiacs, at the time, were somewhat more sport-oriented than Buicks. The Aztek, typical of Pontiacs of the time, also had a noticeably cheaper interior than the Rendezvous, with some very unimpressive materials. But even the Rendezvous interior, although a little nicer than the Aztek's, can't compare to most of the Buick interiors of today.

(My co-worker did, BTW, end up buying a new Rendezvous for him and his family).

And, as Always, Happy Car-Memories

MM

 

I've thought about getting one of these on and off to do something cool to it for the novelty... Just no place to park it.

 

Very interesting shot of the T/A Aztek, Dave....that's a good one.

 

I can only think of Walter White...

 

*puts cheap gas in the aztek*

i am the engine who knocks

 

I happened to know 2 golfing buddies that owned the Aztec and rode in it many times. I must say I was impressed with the smooth ride and quiet engine/trans. It was not a bad vehicle once you ignored the styling.

 

Nice! .......

 

Yes.....I test-drove the similar Buick Rendezvous (done on the same platform), and it was a decently-riding (if appliance-like) vehicle. I suspect the Aztek may (?) have had slightly firmer suspension, as was typical Pontiac practice.....but, with typical Pontiac specs of the period, firmer didn't necessarily mean stiff.

 

You beat me to it!

 

Laugh-stocking MAO!

 

When I used the term laughing-stock, what I meant was that this vehicle was the butt of many jokes, particularly with Jay Leno and his late-night show....Leno, of course, is a classic auto-enthusiast.

 

Sitting in a Mickey D's way back in the ski country of Colorado a few days after 9/11, my companion and I noticed a parade of Azteks pull into the driveway - a few weeks before its formal appearance in the marketplace. It was a press junket for a number of automotive writers being put on by Pontiac in hopes of garnering some glowing prose about their new baby.

I'm not sure what the writers thought, but the patrons of the restaurant fell silent when the caravan circled the building looking for a place to park them together . . . and there was a universal groan from the assembled crowd - and certainly not one of envy or appreciation. I heard one guy at a nearby table say, "What is THAT?" and not in a nice way. Based on the public reception, I figured at that point the Aztek was DOA at the dealerships and those vendors would be elbowing each other to see who was going to get saddled with a load of ugly from the manufacturer.

Sadly, GM was in a slump in those years and desperately needed a winner. This wasn't it.

 

As well as a lot of other vehicles.....Really best when Lutz called the shots.....

 

collector's item