In addition to those mentioned above - maybe consider an Infiniti FX 35 or 45? Ride quality might be a little firm though and not sure you'd be able to find low mileage ones (if that even matters to you).

 

On SUVs, there are generally two camps - softroaders that are built more like cars - these include Lexus RX, Acura MDX, Toyota Highlander and those built off truck designs, can offroad - like Lexus GX, 4runners. The ones built off truck platforms tend to consume more fuel, are heavier but can be designed to be more durable. If you zero in on a Lexus, have a look at the model-specific forums, they will help you look for the common issues / repairs on a used vehicle

I would suggest that you look at total cost of ownership (depreciation, insurance, gas, repairs) before you drive the SUVs. Then you can make an educated decision is to whether one vehicle is worth US$200 more a month versus another for example