mmarshall

So.......Congratulations to your son, daughter, or other family member on their successful graduation from high school, college, trade-school, or driving-course, and/or for getting his or her Drivers' License. While some young people, today, are delaying or shunning car-ownership or getting their license, for others, there is little choice, or, in some cases, it pretty much becomes a necessity, especially upon getting that first job and having to commute every day. Or, they are just leaving home, starting school at a college or university far away, and, for the first time in their lives, need transportation of their own, apart from borrowing Mom or Dad's vehicle. Or, for your loving instincts as parents (after all, you brought them into this world, cared for them, and raised them to this point)...you just want to help your son or daughter get started in an age (and economy) when it is not as easy to do so, with fewer opportunities, than it was in my youth, when jobs were everywhere, almost for the asking.

Even so, my own late Father, a retired Army Intelligence Specialist then working at Philco/Ford, even though he did not have a huge income (and my late Mother did not work full-time), saw fit to give me, for my high-school graduation, a car of my own (albeit a several-year-old, used one). I had been driving our family's 1968 Plymouth Valiant (I recently did a Car-Chat review on the old 1963 Valiant we had before that, the car I actually learned to drive in) and driving our 1965 Ford Thunderbird (that car was a real treat)...myself paying for the gas and little else. But those were actually in my parents' name....this car would be in my name, and I would be responsible for all of it...gas, taxes, insurance, repairs, etc.....My Dad was a firm believer the Chrysler products of the era, and bought me, for $600, a well-used, white 1964 Plymouth Barracuda that used oil and had a balky 2-barrel carburetor on its small V8 (warm-ups had some hesitation and carb-icing), but was otherwise in good running shape. I kept it for a while and then, out of my own pocket, got a used big Buick when I was in college (Darn, I loved that car...I was a real fan of big American full-sized cars in those days...still am).

But, anyhow, enough of my own past.....fast-forward to today. Those of you who are parents may (?) have often pondered the question of what, if, or when, you should give that first vehicle to your son or daughter, partially or totally foot the bill for it, or make them wait until they can afford one on their own. Circumstances, of course, are different for each family, and what works for the Jones many not work for the Smiths (or even for other siblings within the Smith and Jones families). Buying or leasing the vehicle itself, of course, is only one issue to face...there is also the matter of fuel costs, repairs/maintenance, property taxes (if applicable, as here in Virginia where we pay a specific car tax each year, based on the car's KBB-assessed value), and, of course, insurance.....insurance for teen-agers, especially males, can sometimes run a lot more than adults for the same coverage. And, of course, your son or daughter may be concerned about what their friends will think of the car...a natural part of growing up, and I encountered a lot of that myself. Last, there is the question of a new vehicle vs. a used one....in most cases, you can get more vehicle in the used-market, but there will usually be more risk involved, even with a CPO (Certified Previously Owned) one....and CPOs can sometimes run almost as much as new ones. I did a previous thread, some time ago, in Car Chat, on what I thought was probably the best new car to give a student going away to school, particularly in a bad-weather or severe-winter area (a Subaru Impreza or XV Crosstrek)....but this thread goes way beyond that. It tackles the question of whether kids should really get a new (or used) vehicle at all from their parents, and/or when. There's probably no one single answer (remember all the differences between the Smiths and the Jones's) and I thought would be a good idea to get input from those of you who are interested in the subject.....or who have kids of your own and could very likely be facing this decision some day.

So...discuss.

MM

Toys4RJill

mmarshall

I don't have any kids of my own, but, on this issue, I tend to be somewhere in the middle. It can really be tough, in today's economy, to cut the cords at home and move away, and yes, a nice starter-vehicle can be a big help. But, on the other hand, some kids today are just plain spoiled, and think that their parents owe them a new M3...which they will probably wreck before they've had it very long.

In fact, some years ago, that actually happened close to my place. A kid from my local high school, with a brand-new Pontiac GTO, one of the few that were actually sold in the D.C. area (it was not a popular car) was drag-racing it one night on a road, about a mile or so from my house, lost it on a sharp turn, plowed it into a tree right next the road, totalled it, and killed himself. His mother had bought it for him not even a week beforehand. A real shame.

RNM GS3

situman

You people are too entitled these days. They dont understand the value of a dollar and just expect things to be handed to them and want the CEO title first day on the job. Would I get them their own car? Not directly. They can choose whatever car they want and I will help with down payment. They are on their own the rest of the way. It is called responsibility, something lost on young people these days. Not all, but most.

mjeds

my daughter will be of driving age (permit) this coming July,

when I was her age my father bought me a car at a police auction for $300. 1978 Trans Am. He and I then spent 2 years restoring the vehicle, he matched every penny I put into it, that was the deal, I work, I pay for the parts, and I do half the work, he matched the money and taught me how to do the work. When I was 17 and a month before I graduated HS, I was allowed to get my license, up to that point I was only allowed my permit and only allowed to drive with mom or dad in their cars never alone, once I had my license I was allowed to drive the car I helped to restore. He insured me until I was 19.

My father felt that I would be more responsible and take better care of the vehicle if I had skin in it, plus it gave me the opportunity to learn how to work on vehicles and not rely on mechanics.

Once I graduated from USMC MOS school 1.5 years later when I was 19, he signed the car over to me and I was 100% responsible for the insurance..


I am essentially doing the same with my daughter. She wants a 1969 Mustang Fastback as her first car, I told her that if she helped restore it, then she could have it when she graduates high school, until then she would only be allowed to drive with me or my wife, same as when I was her age.

The only difference is I am not expecting her to help pay for the restore, I would rather she focus her time and energy on school and music, and not get a job. She volunteers now at the local pool and symphony, and if she wants a summer job that is fine, but unlike me I don't want her to work during school, things are a lot different now, and she doesn't need the distraction. I was never going to go to college, I was a delayed enlisted USMC recruit for 2 years, signed up with dads permission when I was in the 10th grade. My daughter on the other hand will be going to college, she has already been accepted and is eager to go, and is currently dual enrolled while in high school.

tex2670

I have a 16 year old who just got his permit, and I'm looking forward to when he can drive. He will inherit the wife's car, and she'll get a new one.

The issue is not just your child's independence, but your own as well. If you are of a 2-working parent household: how do they get home from after-school activities? (our late bus is a joke--they have to wait around for another hour to catch it, and a single late bus routes around the entire town for a 45-60 minute run--the kids get home around 6:00 instead of 4:00) If you want them to get a job, how do they get back and forth? We can't be ducking out of work at 3:00 multiple times a week to do this, so the other alternative is to hire, essentially, a baby-sitter just for shuttle service.

I understand the argument about making them earn it, and pay for it. But (1) I would prefer him driving a car that's not too old, because of some of the more advanced safety systems available, and (2) do I really want him burning a chunk of savings on a car in HS? He's going to need that money years from now for important things.

mmarshall

Good points, tex. Best of luck to your son in his driver-training. (I didn't really need a formal driving-school, and learned very well with just my late Mom and Dad teaching me...that may or may not work for your son). When I got my license in the late 60s, you either passed or failed the final driving test...that was it, and you either had your license, or you didn't. Today, in a some states, they have gotten away from that All-or-Nothing approach, and issue Graduated-Stage-Licenses, with increasing driving freedom in each stage. If you pass one stage, obey the conditions, and keep your nose clean, you go on to the next stage...until the day comes when you are on your own.

mjeds

most if not all states require formal driving school if you are under 18. Some even require it if you are over 18 and have never had a permit.

geko29

The plan all along has been to pass on my E90 335d to my son (currently 11.5). He absolutely adores the car, and I'll be ready to move on at that point anyway. With the exception of the crappy emissions system (thanks EPA!), it's been almost perfectly reliable just like my E46 was. As of next month the worst offenders will be exorcised, so I expect it will keep running like a top for many years to come. I'll effectively be "buying" him a $5k used car that I just happen to know the entire service history of. He's a good kid and a great student, so to me, that doesn't feel like spoiling him.

Just like my parents did for me, I'll pay for his insurance as long as he keeps his grades up. He'll be responsible for doing regular maintenance, though obviously I'll help to make sure he learns the ropes. Beyond that he's on his own, with one exception: I've already made clear that if he gets a significant scholarship, I will buy him a practical new car of his choice, once he's allowed to have one at school (freshmen typically aren't). We're not talking M4 or GT350 here, something well-equipped in the Civic/Golf/Corrola/Camcord realm. I think that's more than fair, as we both come out ahead.

Since mjeds brought working into the mix, I'll throw in my thoughts there as well, which are only slightly divergent from his. When he's in school, I want his focus to be on school and related activities, and therefore only taking a job that is in furtherance of his education/career. Something related to his major, most likely. If that's in the sciences, lab assistant for example. In CS or IT, campus tech support would be fine. Things like that. But I wouldn't want him to be working at a fast-food joint, mall store or movie theater, as that would be taking time away from his studies and other enrichment for little benefit beyond the meager paycheck. In my mind it's penny wise and pound foolish to work until 2 or 3 in the morning to make a few hundred bucks a week, and then sleep through class, when school costs $20-60k/year. In the summer is a different story, unless he chooses to take summer classes I would expect him to work more or less full-time.

mmarshall

At one time, it was taught in high schools (as it should be, IMO). I don't know if it still is...Being single, and not a parent, I haven't kept up with a lot of today's school curriculums.

mmarshall

Sounds like a good and reasonable plan to me. As a young man, I would have loved to have had a brand new car at that age, though neither me nor my dad could really afford one. i got my first new one at age 23 (a domestic compact)...at my own expense, after I had started my Federal carer.

As for your son, personally, I see no reason why, at a civilian college/university, a freshman can't be allowed to own his or her own car (a military academy, of course, with its rigid discipline, might be another story). But, if the school has that rule, perhaps (?) it is there for a good reason, and I don't claim to be a Know-it-All.

geko29

It's typically a combination of limited parking, and wanting the freshmen to get involved on campus instead of jetting off right after class. And to be clear, freshmen can own cars, just at many schools they won't be issued parking permits unless they're commuter students. So it's either no car or parking off-campus for residents.

tex2670

Correct. This was how my college was many years ago--no cars for freshmen. Trying to make it harder for kids to take off for the weekend, and make more campus friends and be involved in campus weekend social life. College is more than just hitting the books.

A neighbor's daughter enrolled in a NE state school, and transferred out after 1 semester because the campus essentially became a commuter school on weekends, and was like a ghost town. She hated it.

Stroock639

assuming the kid is doing what they're supposed to be doing and doing it well, i don't see why it would be a bad thing for them to have some sort of car... my first car was a 12 year old hand-me-down from the grandparents, and my sister a few years ago got my dad's 2004 camry, and to me that seems like a decently non-jappy enough way to do things lol

also, are we making a distinction between "getting" a car and a kid just being able to use their parents car?