this only happened to one sparkplug when removed
what went wrong here
maybe i tighten the plug too tight and that damaged the gasket ring?

btw- the tip is dry or has no oil deposit

 

Most likely your valve cover gasket is leaking or needs some tightening.

 

Bingo. The 2JZ engines have a common problem in leaky valve cover gaskets. My bet is that it is plug #6 (all the way in the back). The oil is on the outside of the plug, meaning there is oil in the sparkplug valley. While you're in there, replace the gaskets.