 |
09-05-05, 08:42 AM
|
#1
|
|
Pole Position
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 359
|
democrat, Republican, or Southern Republican?
Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, then raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his
hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this
send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was
stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few
days and try to come to a consensus.
blah blah blah blah blah
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Republican's Answer:
BANG! kill them all
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Southern Republican's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....
(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips
or Hollow Points?"
__________________
5w30 m1 full syn, clear bumpers,2.25 dual mani.back 14" res.x2 w/ ghl mufflers with Xpipe, bfi intake/res. removed, cross drilled/slotted rotors, 20% tint all win, GS 5 spoke rims 225/50F 245/50/16R , t.b. and i. m. coolant bypass, Electric fan, egr delete, daizen ft. control arm bushings, red /clear tails, hella horns, breather, H.O. foglights, trac fuse pulled 
"Aerodynamics are for people who don't now how to make horsepower."-Enzo Ferari
|
|
|
|
09-06-05, 03:28 PM
|
#2
|
|
Lead Lap
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Arizona
Posts: 607
|
I guess that makes me a Southern Republican, even though I'm from the north.
Thats some funny shyt.
|
|
|
|
|
09-06-05, 04:41 PM
|
#3
|
|
Lexus Champion
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,186
|
You forgot southern democrat, Kill him, then blame him on the republicans and their policies.
(yes I am making fun of myself  )
|
|
|
|
|
09-08-05, 11:22 AM
|
#4
|
|
Pole Position
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: IN
Posts: 217
|
'Nother Southern Republican here. That was pretty funny. Thanks.
|
|
|
|
|
09-21-05, 02:24 PM
|
#5
|
|
Pole Position
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 359
|
not starting anything but STRANGE how no democrats replied 
__________________
5w30 m1 full syn, clear bumpers,2.25 dual mani.back 14" res.x2 w/ ghl mufflers with Xpipe, bfi intake/res. removed, cross drilled/slotted rotors, 20% tint all win, GS 5 spoke rims 225/50F 245/50/16R , t.b. and i. m. coolant bypass, Electric fan, egr delete, daizen ft. control arm bushings, red /clear tails, hella horns, breather, H.O. foglights, trac fuse pulled
"Aerodynamics are for people who don't now how to make horsepower."-Enzo Ferari
|
|
|
|
|
09-21-05, 03:28 PM
|
#6
|
|
Lexus Champion
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: St. Petersburg, Florida
Posts: 1,688
|
Democrat / Southern-Republican here. I have a Glock 17, there would be more BANGs if needed. But I'm sure I'd put him down on the first BANG. 
Funny stuff.
__________________
99GS400 BlacknTan, L-Tuned sus/exh/ecu, K&N filter
Officially the unofficial 2005 CL FFL Champion - I need to brag a little
Member TLN# 79
University of Oklahoma - Class of '92'
|
|
|
|
|
09-21-05, 03:31 PM
|
#7
|
|
Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Miami, Florida
Posts: 11,761
|
Would add a few more lines...
Southern Republican's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....
(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips
or Hollow Points?"
Dad: "Yes they were now run to the gun store and buy daddy some more"
|
|
|
|
|
| Thread Tools |
|
|
| Display Modes |
 Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:16 PM.
|
|
